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[NOTE: This is an unedited tape transcript of an unpublished darshan diary, which has been scanned and cleaned up. It is for reference purposes only.]


(Osho is addressing Ma Prem Vanya; first he explains the origin of her name.)

Vanya is the Russian form of John. John is Hebrew. Travelling, passing through many other languages, by the time it reached Russia it became Vanya, and really it has become far more beautiful than John.

John was the most beloved disciple of Jesus, hence it has become symbolic of a beloved disciple. Your full name means, love makes one a beloved disciple.

The relationship between the master and the disciple is not an ordinary relationship. It is not mundane, it is not of the marketplace, it is not out of calculation. It is simply falling in love. It is a little bit mad, but if a person is not capable of going a little bit glad he is not alive. Just a little bit of madness adds much spice to life. Not too much is needed, just a little bit, because if you make the whole of the food of spices you will not be able to eat it -- just a little bit, just like salt.

The so-called sane people in the world have not even a little bit of madness in them -- that's why their lives are flat, saltless, tasteless, boring. Particularly your so-called saints are all boring. There seems to be no joy in their being no explosion of delight, for the simple reason that they live in a very controlled way; they are afraid of that little bit of madness. But that is an essential ingredient to make life significant.

Poets who are really poets have that, painters who are really painters have that. Musicians, sculptors, scientists, people who create something in this world all have that little bit of madness.

To be a disciple means to fall headlong in love. And it is the ultimate form of love because nothing is expected out of it; it is for its own sake. But it transforms your being because when love is for its own sake it can become total. There is no division between the means and the end; it is both the means and the end. And when it is both then it is possible to be involved in it without

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