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real, love her as much as you can. Pay her immediately, so her realness becomes an investment and phoniness becomes simply bankruptcy. You understand me?
[The boyfriend says: We used to fight a lot... and she says: It was so tiring.]
If you stopped just because you felt tired, then you will be sad, because then you have not stopped for the right reason -- just 'tired'! Understand that it is futile -- not tiring When you stop because it is tiring you have not understood the point at all. You really still wanted to fight, but because it is tiring you have stopped. No understanding has happened. It is better to fight, and to be happy and tired -- at least you will be true. The truth will be very animalistic, but at least it will be true. And don't try to be angels before time. People who try to be angels before they have any maturity of understanding, fall below animals.
Mature, try to understand. Tiredness is not the question; it is the futility of it, the foolishness, the stupidity of it -- not tiredness. Just the whole thing is nonsense -- and that is not in any condemnatory sense, simply as a fact; it is nonsense. It leads nowhere and is a vicious circle, endless.
But understand it and then it drops -- not that you drop it; it drops of its own accord. Then you have a tremendous release of energy. The same energy which was becoming violent, aggressive, fighting, anger, this and that, is now released. Now the same energy is available to celebrate, to dance, to love.
So this time when you go back, be real....
[To the boyfriend] It is not easy to control a woman! she will find a thousand ways and one to get out of it, don't be worried! Life can be rally such a laughter if you are true. Just the idea gives such beautiful freedom.
So for these months, be really true -- fight, be angry, be sad. Sometimes, it will be too much... but then you will have a few glimpses of beautiful celebration, a few glimpses of laughter. and they are worth it. But they come only when anger is true. When anger is false, laughter is false.
So you just start from anywhere to be true -- because the falseness has not paid. It is time...
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