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will come to its peak, and suddenly you will see that a great sexual desire is arising. Don't be surprised. This is a good indication that you are becoming alive again.
Sex is life. It is life energy, elan vital, libido -- whatsoever you call it. Once you give it total freedom, spontaneity, by and by you will see that without repressing it, it starts being transformed into a subtle understanding. But that is not repression. Your whole sensitivity remains the same, on the peak. You retain your clarity of eyes, clarity of thinking, clarity of every door of your being; everything remains clear and open. By and by sex starts being transformed into a higher plane. You become more creative. You start creating something -- a painting, a poetry, a music playing on the instrument or something.
This is not repression... this is expression.
Then sex disappears -- that's what brahmacharya is. The real celibacy... you become virgin again.
Just see. A child is born. The child is virgin, absolutely innocent. All the energy is there -- you cannot have clearer eyes than a child. Now psychoanalysts say that up to the age of four, children see things that nobody else sees, detects even; they are very perceptive. They will hear things that nobody else will hear. Everything is clear, is bound to be clear. Everything is fresh and young. But there is no sexuality yet. Everything is moving in harmony.
Then sex enters at the age of fourteen. Now their body is completely ready to give birth to some other bodies. Then nature starts using their energy. Their whole attention becomes sexual. If life doesn't go naturally, if a child does not become sexual at the age of fourteen, then something has gone wrong; the child is abnormal.
Exactly the same happens near the age of forty-two. As sex arises at the age of fourteen, religion arises at the age of forty-two. If everything goes naturally, then at the age of forty-two, sex will again disappear. But nothing goes naturally, mm? So seventy years, eighty years, and sex.... Because everything is repressed. Exactly at fourteen years, sex starts, at twenty eight it reaches its peak, and at forty-two sex recedes;
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