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of war. The warrior attains to something on the warfront. While fighting, he encounters death. And those are the moments of peak.
But there is no need to depend on these artificial things. They are just like depending on LSD or marijuana -- artificial. There is no need to drive your car madly, at such a speed that danger is there every moment. There is no need -- because you can walk slowly and attain to that awareness.
Once you attain to that awareness, you live. You live on the Everest of being. And then a discipline arises of its own accord. Not that you bring it; it happens. It is not your doing.
[I decided today that I was definitely going to leave this Primal group that I'm doing. But I feel split.... but there's something else that wants me to be outside in the sun, and be allowed to do what I want.]
No, be there. You have been in the sun before -- and what have you attained? Just three or four days before, you were in the sun, and after three or four days you will be in the sun. The sun is going to be there. It is not going to disappear because of your Primal. So that is not the choice. This is a trick of the mind.
Always stick to something which is new, howsoever hard... there is something to learn there. These are tricks of the mind -- to be in the open and in the sun. Why not do the whole process? There may be something that you want to avoid. There may be something that you are escaping. You may be afraid of something arising from the unconscious. It may just be on the brink so one becomes panicky and starts finding rationalisations to escape. No... never.
Always insist for the new, for the unfamiliar. The familiar is always there. The Primal group is not going to be your life-long thing -- just a few more days -- so why be in a hurry? In fact after a few days you will enjoy the sun more because of the Primal.
I was reading the other day about a poor Jew who was so desperate about his life that he had given up any hope for change and as a last resort went to see his rabbi. He told him in great detail of his horrible existence: that he was so poor that he, his wife and six children, and his mother and
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