| |
to find you. It is good to play the game of hide and seek, but don't hide so much that the other gets fed up with the game and goes home! Then there will be no point.
Children play hide and seek but they always hide in such a way that the other can find them. It is never made almost impossible. It is a challenge and they go on making noises so the other knows where they are. The other goes on playing the game of seeking them, knowing where they are. But if you hide so much that it becomes impossible to seek you, then the whole game is finished.
Nothing is wrong with you -- it is just an old habit. It will melt with a little more understanding. Do something against it... that is the only way to break a habit.
[A sannyasin participant of the Tathata group says: I lost my frightened streak -- it was really unbelievable. But also I found that I am dead. I don't feel anything towards people... ]
That will come. There is nothing to worry about.
You have put your life in certain fears too much. Because those fears are gone you will feel as if you are dead for a few days, because the old channels for the life to flow are no more there. Many people love only because they are afraid. They think that they are loving but deep down there is fear -- fear of being left alone, fear of isolation.
But if fear disappears, suddenly they will see that their love has also disappeared because basically, deep down it was fear, not love. Many people pray because they are afraid. They go to the church and temple and pray. If their fear really disappears they will stop going to the church because the fear was the base of their prayer; their god was nothing but fear personified. Now the fear is no more there, they will become godless.
This happens to many people because we don't know exactly what we are doing with our life. We call it love... maybe it is something else. We call it prayer; maybe it is something else. We call it meditation; maybe it is something else. The mind is such a confusion that it is very difficult to know exactly where the problem is. Once you start changing one thing, you will become aware that the mind goes on deceiving
|
|
|