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if you feel hurt, he should never pretend!
Because pretension kills love. Hurts, love can tolerate as many as possible. Hurts are nothing -- in fact they make love
even deeper; each hurt brings a new life -- but pretensions kill. So if you pretend that you are not jealous, on the surface you will say, 'I love you', and deep down you will hate; deep down you will want to take revenge. And you will take revenge in many ways. Then you will be in a split.
My suggestion is -- let it be really open. If you are jealous, then you are jealous, and if he felt infatuated, he felt infatuated. What can you do? Human beings are very helpless. You understand his limitations, and he understands your limitations.
Now the second possibility is to make it closed -- then there is every security... but then it is dead! Then you are caged! There are two alternatives: either he pretends that he never looks at any other woman, and when you are not there he's very happy.... In fact when you are not with him, he is very happy that he feels a little freedom. Whenever you are there he is a little depressed, so he becomes a hypocrite. You have killed the man. And how can you love a hypocrite? How is a hypocrite going to give you any happiness?
.... Or the other possibility is that he may be a religious person -- that is even more dangerous... more than the hypocrite. He may be a very sincere person, a serious person: he not only pretends, he tries to do it. Then he can do it. He Gan close all possibilities of being interested in anybody, but then by and by he will lose interest in you.
It is as if you force somebody only to breathe when you are with him. You will find him dead sooner or later, because when you are not there, what is he going to do? He cannot breathe! So for twenty-three hours he cannot breathe, and for one hour he can breathe only when he is with you. That's what we are doing about love. We say, 'Only love me, and for twenty-three hours, no love, no breathing. And then one hour, pour down all your love, breathe as much as you want to breathe!'... It creates a neurotic state!
Very good that it is open. Good that it hurts! You
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