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Then one part of your being clings to them, and one part tries to solve them -- there is a dichotomy. Then you move in diametrically opposite directions, because one part has become so accustomed to them that without them it will not be able to live.
I used to know one couple. The husband is a drunkard, and for almost fifteen years the wife had been continuously fighting. That was the only problem. She would come to me and she would say, 'This is the only problem. If you can solve it.... And my husband comes to you -- he is almost a disciple to you. He is mad about you because when he gets drunk, he talks only of you -- nothing else! So help me! I don't want any enlightenment,' the woman said, 'I don't want any peace of mind. If my husband is not in this mad state, I will be perfectly happy.'
So I told the husband, 'Just for seven days try not to drink, and let us see what happens.' For seven days he stopped. In the first place the wife was never expecting this. She had been talking about it, but not expecting it. Fifteen years' investment suddenly gone -- nothing to talk about, nothing to fight about. And not only that -- her power, her 'holier than thou' attitude.... Suddenly the husband was no more that dirty fellow, that drunkard, and she could not pull him down again and again the whole day.
On the seventh day I went to their house, and asked, 'How are you feeling?' She said, 'I am feeling sad. This is strange -- he has really stopped! But I am feeling very sad -- as if my whole life's work is gone. Now I don't see why I should live. That had become my meaning.'
It is very dangerous to live with problems too long -- they become your meaning. So immediately whenever there is a problem, the first thing is -- if you can, drop it. If you cannot drop it by any chance, then solve it. The problem that cannot be dropped is worth solving, and you will grow through it.
So forget your husband and the problems connected with him, mm? Just be here... and forget america.
And if you need problems, I can create many, mm? (laughter)
Blessed Are the Ignorant
Chapter #4
Chapter title: I am the Answer
7 December
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