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we cannot call it happiness and we cannot call it unhappiness. It is beyond duality, it is transcendental. It is a silent joy, a peaceful joy, it is ecstasy without excitement -- and that is the goal.
Phillip, literally, does not mean much. It means a lover of horses: phil, hippos. But in another way it has some significance. Phillip was one of the disciples of Jesus, one of the twelve disciples. That way it is significant, it has some association with Jesus, and to be associated with Jesus in any way is beautiful.
So your full name will mean a blissful disciple, a disciple who has attained the state of bliss. And to be a disciple is a great experience. That's what sannyas is all about: entering into disciplehood, entering into the world of learning -- not of knowledge but of learning. Knowledge is accumulative; learning is not accumulative. Through knowledge, one becomes knowledgeable; one has more and more knowledge in the head. Through learning, one's being is transformed; not that one knows more, but one is more.
It is not a question of quantity, it is a question of quality: one is more, one has more authenticity, rootedness, groundedness, one is more centered.
Become a blissful disciple. Enjoy learning the new, the unknown... And the moment you have learned it, forget all about it; don't carry its weight, so you remain available to learn more. Go on dying to knowledge: whatsoever becomes knowledge has to be dropped; the moment you have known it, it is finished. Throw it away, be empty again, so you are again available to know more.
Each moment one has to die to knowledge; that is the way of the disciple: he remains open-ended, he remains available, he is ready to go with the truth, he has no prejudices, no preconceived ideas, he carries no past. He lives in the moment and the moment is all. And to live in the moment is the only way to learn about God. One cannot learn about God through the Bible or the Koran or the Vedas, one learns about God by being in the present moment, by being open empty, by functioning from a state of no-knowledge and by being blissful. A blissful openness... that is the meaning of your name. Let it
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