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It does not need any great logical mind to grasp it, it is a very simple phenomenon. Looking at the futility of desire, one simply recoils from desiring. Not that one starts trying to be in the present: seeing the futility of desire, the desire disappears and suddenly you are in the present. It is a happening.
My suggestion for you is that something more like Vipassana or Zazen is going to help you. You have done enough of encounter and gestalt therapy -- enough is enough!
But this has been the problem with Esalen people: they come full of jargon, modern jargon, psychological, absolutely up to date. They don't talk about occultism and esoteric, theological things -- they bring fresh bullshit!
Up to now very few of them have really proved of much worth. The greater lot has proved to be very ordinary -- for the simple reason that they think they understand. The greatest barrier in understanding is to think that one understands.
Sannyas means dropping all knowledge and becoming a child again.
And the second word, "jacob," means: may God protect you. Don't seek bliss, don't be seriously after it -- I am afraid you may be still seriously after it, that's why "jacob" is good: may God protect you! Only God can protect Esalen people -- there is no other hope!
OSHO (TO GAYLE): Without love one simply drags oneself -- SOMEhow. Life is a burden -- how can you dance? Without love there is nothing worthwhile -- how can you dance? For what? -- there is nothing to feel joyous about and nothing to feel grateful for. If you try to dance your dance will be false and phony and it will simply tire you. It will not nourish you, it will not rejuvenate you.
Love is the source of all rejuvenation, the source of nourishment. Just as the body needs food, the soul needs love. One can dance without love but then it will be only technical because the soul will be missing in it; only the body will be going through empty gestures. One can smile without there being any smile in the heart but then that smile will be painted, just on the lips, an exercise of the lips -- good as an exercise but with no value, with no depth, with no roots in one's being.
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