| |
he knew full well that the thought had surfaced from his mind.
They started for another friend's house. Now he had firmly resolved not to say that the clothes were his; he had steeled his mind. By the time they had reached the gate he had reached an irrevocable decision that he would not say the clothes were his.
That poor man didn't know that the more he resolved not to say anything, the more firmly rooted the inner awareness that the clothes belonged to him became. Moreover, when are such firm decisions made? When a man makes a firm resolution, like a vow of celibacy for example, it means that his sexuality is pushing desperately from inside. If a man resolves he will eat less or will fast from today on, it implies he has a deep desire to eat more. Such efforts inevitably result in inner conflict. We are what our weaknesses are. But we decide to curb them; we resolve to fight against them -- and naturally, this becomes a source of subconscious conflict.
So, engaged in inner struggle, our farmer went into the house. He began very carefully: "He is my friend" -- but he noticed that nobody was paying any attention to him; that everybody was looking at his friend and at his clothes with awe, and it struck him, "That is my coat! And my turban!" But he reminded himself again not to talk about the clothes. He was resolved. "Everybody has clothes of some kind or another, poor or rich. It is a trivial matter," he explained to himself. But the clothes swung before his eyes like a pendulum, to and fro, to and fro.
He resumed the introduction: "He is my friend. A childhood friend. A very fine gentleman. And the clothes? Those are his, and not mine."
The people were surprised. They had never before heard such an introduction: "The clothes are his and not mine"!
After they had left, he again apologized profusely. "A big blunder," he admitted. Now he was confused about what to do and what not to do. "Clothes never had a hold on me like this before! Oh God, what has happened to me?"
What had happened to him? The poor fellow did not know that the technique he was using on himself is such that even if God himself tried it, the clothes
|
|
|