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understand that your morality is just imposed. You are an impostor pretending to be moral, not knowing even the ABC of morality. Your character is nothing.
When I applied for a professorship, they asked me for a character certificate. I said, "I cannot produce one."
The education minister said, "But why not?"
I said, "For the simple reason that I haven't found a man of character from whom I would like to have a character certificate."
He said, "You are something. You can't find a man of character?"
I said, "No, I can't find a man of character. And how can I have a character certificate from somebody to whom I cannot give a character certificate?"
I knew my vice-chancellor and I told him, "I cannot take a character certificate from you because I cannot give a character certificate to you. I know you perfectly well."
I knew my head of department, who was a very loving man, who loved me. But he himself said, "I cannot give you a character certificate because I don't have any character and you know it perfectly well."
I said to the education minister, "You give me a character certificate, and I will expose you -- I will just call a press conference today. You give me a character certificate and I will tell the press conference what kind of character you have."
He started perspiring. He said, "You just take your appointment later."
But I said, "What about the character certificate? -- because it has to be attached to the application."
He said, "Don't be worried."
I said, "No, it is a question of principle. If everybody needs a character certificate then I will write a character certificate for myself. That's the only man I know perfectly well who has character. About anybody else it is at the most guesswork."
He said, "Do whatsoever you want, just please leave me alone. You take your order." So I wrote a character certificate for myself. He said, "But please don't sign it in your own name because I will be in trouble."
Then I said, "Whose name have I to sign?"
He said, "Anybody's name but not your own name."
So I signed it in the name of one of my professors.
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