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to be there at least seventy, eighty years in the world. It is a big project.' Even if you want, note it down in the diary. When the child is born, then you can be angry, but not right now. Just say, 'I am a pregnant mother. I cannot be angry -- that is not allowed.' This is what I call sensitive understanding.
No more sadness, no more anger, no more hatred, no more fighting with Anand Veda. Both have to look to the child. When a child is there you are both secondary; the child has every preference. Because a new life is going to be born... and it is going to be your fruit. If from the very beginning anger, hatred, conflict, enters into the child's mind, then you are causing hell for him. He will suffer. Then it is better not to bring a child into the world. Why bring a child into suffering? The world is tremendous suffering.
In the first place bringing a child into this world is a very risky affair. But even if you want that, at least bring a child who will be totally different in this world -- who will not be miserable, who will at least help the world to be a little more celebrating. He will bring a little more festivity into the world... a little more laughter, love, life.
So for these days, be celebrating. Dance, sing, listen to music, meditate, love. Be very soft. Don't do anything hectic, in a hurry. Don't do anything in a tension. Just go slowly. Slow down absolutely. A great guest is to come -- you have to receive him. Good, be a mother! Good.
[A sannyasin says: I tried to run away several times from you.]
That's a good sign. Those who are in love with me, they always try! But there is no way: the more you try, the more you will be caught. One can never escape from love. It is impossible; it just does not happen. If I love you, how can you escape? I know that when there is love a fear arises -- a great fear arises in the being -- because you start losing your individuality, your ego, your definition. Love is a sure super-kill. So one becomes apprehensive. One tries to protect oneself -- and naturally. The instinct is there to protect oneself.
But when you go away, when you try to go away, you find it impossible,
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