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then youth comes, then you are old. Things happen -- love happens, hatred happens, and the memory goes on recording. When you look at the past, the whole accumulated memory becomes "I". "I" loved someone. It would be better and more exact to say that somewhere love happened, I was not the doer. But the memory that "I loved" has happened just like birth, just like death.
If a person can remember this only for twenty-four hours, that things are happening and there is no doer, he will not be the same again. But it is very arduous to remember even for a single moment.
It is the most arduous thing to remember that events are happening and you are not the doer. For example, I am speaking. If I say, "I am speaking" and mean that "I" am speaking, then I have misinterpreted the phenomenon. I do not know what the next sentence will be. When it comes you will know it and I will know it. It is a happening, so I cannot relate myself to it. Something comes through me. I am not at all a doer. Something happens in me.
This is what is meant when we say the Vedas are impersonal. We say they are not created by persons. We mean by this that those who compiled the Vedas know this fact -- the fact that something is a happening. They are not doers, something is coming to them. They are only the passage, the medium, the vehicle, and even this being a vehicle is a happening. It is not their doing that they have become vehicles. Otherwise, the same fallacy will be there on another level.
So go deep in any of your acts, and you will find happenings there. There will be no act, because there is no actor. So how can one ask why? Who can answer this? The house is vacant, the owner is not. Let things go on happening. The house itself without the owner is capable of happenings.
Try to understand it more clearly. Buddha said so many times, "When we walk there is no walker, only the walk." How can this be understood? If I am not, how can I walk? Walk, and find where you are -- you will find only the walk. We cannot understand how some one can say there is speaking and no speaker. But as you go deep in the act of speaking, you will find no speaker but just speaking.
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