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the past as a load hanging around your neck like a rock; drop it. And don't try to drop it piece by piece; that is unnecessary postponement. Drop the whole lot in a single blow. That is courage.
There are people who drop it but chunk by chunk. They take so long a time that the whole thing becomes tedious, wearisome, boring. They miss the joy of becoming free in a single moment.
Initiation simply means that you are ready to cut off from the past in one blow. don't look back. And the moment you are not more concerned with the past, the future disappears of its own accord because the future is nothing but a projection of the past. It is nothing but the desire to live the past again and again... of course in a little modified way, a little richer, a little better. it is dropping all that was miserable in the past and choosing all that was pleasurable. That's what future is. When the past is dropped the future disappears, and only present is left.
To be present in the present creates meditative energy. To be present to the present is the very essence of meditation and the very foundation of sannyas.
The past is the only problem. We are confined by our past. it hangs around us, around our neck like a rock. It keeps us tethered to that which is no more. It keeps us confined to the dead, it does not allow us to move into life.
Life is always present. It is never past, it is never future either, it is always herenow. And we are living in the past, which is no more, or sometimes in the future, which is not yet. Both are non-existential. That's why we don't taste the joy of being alive. We go on chewing stones. We cannot get any juice out of them.
The past is like a stone, something utterly dead, it cannot nourish you. And so is the future. It is not yet born, it is just in your imagination and you cannot live on imaginary food. Only the present gives nourishment to the soul, it makes you more and more alive.
So the whole process of sannyas is dropping the past, dropping the future, and getting more and more attuned to the present moment.
Sannyas is a marriage: marriage to the divine, marriage to the whole, the part deciding
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