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what happened? I missed. The bullet hit the rope before I could hang myself and I fell in the river and the water put out the fire before I could burn myself.
AND YOU KNOW, IF I HAD NOT BEEN A GOOD SWIMMER, I WOULD HAVE ENDED UP DROWNING MY FOOL SELF."~
66.
Mulla Nasrudin and his wife had just been fighting. The wife felt a bit ashamed and was standing looking out of the window. Suddenly, something caught her attention.
"Honey," she called. "Come here, I want to show you something."
As the Mulla came to the window to see, she said. "Look at those two horses pulling that load of hay up the hill. Why can't we pull together like that, up the hill of life?"
"THE REASON WE CAN'T PULL UP THE HILL LIKE A COUPLE OF HORSES," said Nasrudin, "IS BECAUSE ONE OF US IS A JACKASS!"
67.
Mulla Nasrudin had finished his political speech and answering questions.
"One question, Sir, if I may," said a man down front you ever drink alcoholic beverages?"
"BEFORE I ANSWER THAT," said Nasrudin, "I'D LIKE TO KNOW IF IT'S IN THE NATURE OF AN INQUIRY OR AN INVITATION."
68.
Mulla Nasrudin's wife was always after him to stop drinking. This time, she waved a newspaper in his face and said, "Here is another powerful temperance moral.
'Young Wilson got into a boat and shoved out into the river, and as he was intoxicated, he upset the boat, fell into the river and was drowned.' See, that's the way it is, if he had not drunk whisky he would not have lost his life."
"Let me see," said the Mulla. "He fell into the river, didn't he?"
"That's right," his wife said.
"He didn't die until he fell in, is that right? " he asked.
"That's true," his wife said.
"THEN IT WAS THE WATER THAT KILLED HIM," said Nasrudin, "NOT WHISKY."
69.
Mulla Nasrudin stormed into the Postmaster General's office and shouted, "I am being pestered by threatening letters, and I want somebody to do something about it."
"I am sure we can help," said the Postmaster General. "That's a federal offence. Do you have any idea who is sending you these letters?"
"I CERTAINLY DO," said Nasrudin.
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