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retire to the bushes to pee and there is trouble with the brambles and the nettles.
Little Ernie walks in amongst them, pulls out his pecker and pees without any trouble.
"Wow!" says little Sally, really impressed, "that's a handy thing to bring on a picnic!"
Mrs. Benzini has been visiting her psychiatrist, Professor Potts, for years and feels that she is not getting any better. One day, she decides to confront the shrink. "Doctor," she says, sitting up on the couch, "I come-a every week for five years. Nothing change-a. What's-a going on? You gotta tell me. What's-a wrong with me?"
"Well," replies Potts, "I will be frank with you. You are crazy!"
"What?" cries Mrs. Benzini. "Crazy? Crazy? I wanna second opinion!"
"Okay," says Potts, "you are ugly too!"
Now close your eyes...
Be absolutely still, as if frozen.
Now, relax.
Now, come back to life.
Okay, Maneesha?
Yes, Osho.
Live Zen
Chapter #3
Chapter title: Pecking and tapping
24 April 1988 pm in Gautam the Buddha Auditorium
Archive code: 8804245
ShortTitle: LIVEZ03
Audio: Yes
Video: Yes
Length: 97 mins
BELOVED OSHO,
A MONK SAID TO KYOSEI, "I WANT TO PECK FROM THE INSIDE. WOULD YOU PLEASE TAP FROM THE OUTSIDE?"
KYOSEI SAID, "COULD YOU ATTAIN LIFE OR NOT?"
THE MONK SAID, "IF I COULD NOT ATTAIN LIFE I WOULD BECOME A LAUGHINGSTOCK."
KYOSEI SAID, "YOU TOO ARE A FELLOW IN THE WEEDS."
SETCHO PUT IT LIKE THIS:
OLD BUDDHA HAD HIS WAY OF TEACHING,
THE MONK'S ANSWER WON NO PRAISE.
STRANGERS TO EACH OTHER, HEN AND CHICK,
WHO CAN PECK WHEN THE TAPPING COMES?
OUTSIDE, THE TAP WAS GIVEN;
INSIDE, THE CHICK REMAINED.
ONCE AGAIN THE TAP WAS GIVEN;
MONKS THROUGHOUT THE WORLD ATTEMPT THE TRICK IN VAIN.
OSHO,
THIS ANECDOTE EVOKES SUCH A BEAUTIFUL IMAGE OF WHAT TRANSPIRES BETWEEN MASTER AND DISCIPLE.
CAN YOU TALK ABOUT THE PECK AND TAP THAT WE CALL OUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU?
Maneesha, before I talk about Kyosei and his statement, I am reminded of a very significant
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