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stretch out one arm, then the other, raise my elbows, hunch my shoulders and then stand straight up."
"Is that so?" said the doctor, sneering, "I don't suppose it has occurred to you that you could avoid this mysterious pain simply by not carrying out such an absurd series of movements."
"It did occur to me, Doctor," the Mulla assured him earnestly. "BUT I COULD NOT THINK OF ANY OTHER WAY OF GETTING INTO MY OVERCOAT."
85.
Mulla Nasrudin was told by his doctor to cut out drink.
"I can't cut it out just like that, Doctor!" wailed the Mulla "It would kill me."
"Hmmm.... you have probably got something there said the doctor. "We will compromise then, and do it gradually.
For the next week you can drink four double scotches a day. No more. The following week we will cut it down to three, and the week-after down to two.
Nasrudin staggered off and was back in a week, absolutely blotto.
"What do you think you are playing at?" demanded the doctor. "I told you to cut down to four double scotches a day."
"I did Doctor, honestly," said the Mulla.
"Well, how is it that you are in this dreadful inebriated condition?"
"Well Doctor, it's like this," said Nasrudin. "After I left you last week, I called on another doctor down the road for a second opinion, AND HE PRESCRIBED THE SAME TREATMENT....."
86.
A preacher was giving a sermon on the dangers of drinking and driving.
"Remember, my friends," he said to the assembled congregation, "whiskey and petrol don't mix."
"They do," muttered Mulla Nasrudin at the back of the mosque to his neighbour, "BUT THEY TASTE AWFUL."
87.
Mulla Nasrudin, a castaway, was washed ashore after many days on the open sea. The island on which he landed was populated by savage cannibals who tied him, dazed and exhausted, to a thick stake. They then proceeded to cut his arms with their spears and drink his blood. This continued for several days until the Mulla could no longer stand it. He called the cannibal king and said, "You can kill me, but this torture with the spears has got to stop. DAMMIT, I AM TIRED OF BEING STUCK FOR THE DRINKS."
88.
"Is
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