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he never put a pipe in his mouth?"
"M'AM," said Nasrudin, "I AM SIXTY-FIVE AND I NEVER PUT IT ANYWHERE ELSE."
94.
You certainly seem in excellent health," said the young physician to the octogenerian, Mulla Nasrudin. "What's your secret?"
"I have kept off drink and women Doctor," said the old Mulla firmly. "Never gone out with a girl or touched a drop in my whole life."
Just then there was a crash and a terrified female screamed from the adjoining room.
"What on earth is that?" asked the doctor in alarm.
"THAT'LL BE FATHER CHASING THE MAID" snapped the grey-beard. "HE'S DRUNK AGAIN!"
95.
When Mulla Nasrudin was ninety, he was asked how he had managed to have such a long life, "I believe," said the Mulla, "that it's due to the fact that I never smoked, drank or touched a girl -- UNTIL I WAS NINE YEARS OF AGE."
96.
"Mulla," asked a man meeting old Mulla nasrudin, who was always carefree inspite of having had more than his share of life's troubles, "how do you manage to remain so cheerful and calm?"
"WELL," replied Nasrudin, "I HAVE JUST LEARNED TO CO-OPERATE WITH THE INEVITABLE."
97.
"And have you made your will, Mulla?"
"INDEED I HAVE," said Mulla nasrudin. "ALL OF ME FORTUNE GOES TO THE DOCTOR THAT SAVES MY LIFE."
98.
Mulla Nasrudin supervised the building of his own tomb.
At last, after one shortcoming after another had been righted, the mason came for the money.
"It is not right yet, builder," said the Mulla.
"Whatever more can be done with it?" asked the mason.
"WE STILL HAVE TO SUPPLY THE BODY," said Nasrudin.
99.
Before his death, Mulla Nasrudin wrote this will.
"The law prescribes that my dependents must receive certain fixed proportions of my possessions and money.
"I HAVE NOTHING: LET THIS BE DIVIDED ACCORDANCE WITH THE ARITHMETICAL FORMULAE OF THE LAW. THAT WHICH IS LEFT OVER IS TO BE GIVEN TO THE POOR."
100.
Scene: The Pearly Gates. St. Peter is interviewing a new arrival.
St Peter: Name?
New arrival: Mulla Nasrudin.
St. Peter: Did you ever gamble,
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