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things that can be done: meditate, enjoy life, eat, walk, run, dance, sing. Whatsoever you feel like doing, do. Do everything else that can be done, but remember, the ultimate cannot be done. There, one is totally helpless; there, one is totally impotent.
If you can do something, you will feel happy. Whether something happens out of it or not, is not the question. You will feel better because the mind will still be manipulating, it will still be doing something. The mind drops only where it cannot do anything, where doing becomes absolutely impossible. The very nature of the thing does not allow any doing. Then the mind falls flat.
That is where you are. It is a very rare situation and comes only to a few fortunate people. But then one feels very miserable and frustrated because again and again it comes, and is so close that you could have got it. It was just within your reach. When you miss it, again you start thinking that it was so close. Just a jump, a knock on the door and you would have entered.
I know it is very close, but you cannot do anything about it. It will be repeated many times. Many times you will perspire, will feel frustrated almost to the point of death. But by and by a new understanding will arise. The frustration is not coming from the experience that comes so close; the frustration is coming because you are. The frustration is coming because you cannot do anything whatsoever. If you do something -- chant a mantra -- the illusion is prolonged that you can do something. But that illusion is the ego.
So I am not going to say to you that anything has to be done. And even I cannot push, because any push and you will go further away from the experience. You will have to live this moment, this critical moment of predicament, this dilemma that is so close, and yet so far away. Just a single step and the journey is over -- and you cannot move your foot. When the goal recedes again, you do everything you can, and then the moment it comes again, you cannot move a single step. It is tremendously frustrating.
But this frustration is needed. When you have become completely soaked in it, one day the experience will be there
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