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Play, Don't Proselytise
2 October 1977 pm in Chuang Tzu Auditorium
Archive code: 7710025
ShortTitle: LOSERS02
Audio: No
Video: No
[A new sannyasin asks if Osho can help his father understand his taking sannyas because he is suffering over it.]
You can help him but his understanding cannot be guaranteed. If somebody wants to suffer then there is no way to help. If he is really that much closed -- that he thinks only the thing he thinks is sane and everything else is insane -- then he deserves suffering; he is earning it. This kind of attitude is bound to create trouble. A mind who is open does not suffer because he can see alternatives and he is always ready to look at things in a different and new way. But if a mind is closed then nobody else is responsible; the suffering is his own responsibility.
But I am not saying to make him suffer. I'm saying to try everything that you can, but still if it doesn't happen, it doesn't happen, and you have to go on your own way. He has suffered enough. If you learn his way you will suffer also. Learn a lesson from him. Whenever you see a man suffering, remember that he must have lived wrongly.
Ordinarily we think others have made him suffer -- that is not right; nobody can make anybody suffer. You can kill me but you cannot make me suffer; that is impossible. You can throw me in gaol -- that is possible -- but you cannot make me suffer. Suffering is my creation: only I can create or uncreate it; nobody else can do anything about it. And so is the case with happiness. You cannot make me happy. You can force me into heaven but you cannot make me happy. Happiness is my own creation, my own freedom. I can remain unhappy even in heaven.
If he has suffered too much he needs all the compassion and all the love that you can muster. But always remember that he must have lived wrongly. He must have remained a closed mind. He must have lived in such a way that he cannot allow other possibilities, alternatives, other people, other philosophies, other religions, other standpoints, other styles. Then he suffers. A man suffers when he wants to impose his idea on
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