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spiritual pregnancy. So don't do anything.
In the morning enjoy it. It is just as a woman when she is pregnant feels heavy in the stomach and breathing becomes difficult. She cannot digest food well; she feels nauseous and sometimes she vomits. She feels uneasy but still she feels happy because she is carrying a new life. She is going to become a mother.
So it will be difficult and you will feel many times to get rid of it, but that will be an abortion. Or, if you become too concerned, there may be a miscarriage. So don't do anything; protect it. That tension is good. It will become more and more intense and become almost like a burning fire in you. It will be imploding and will become smaller and smaller and smaller. It will become almost unbearable, but you have to bear it and bear it blissfully.
One day it starts exploding -- but then it is a rebirth. When the right moment comes it will happen. So forget all about it. One should not be too conscious of these things, otherwise the very consciousness becomes a disturbance.
[The sannyasin adds: And I've had this big dream about getting enlightened... ]
Mm, leave it. That dream is also okay. Unless you dream, how are you going to become enlightened? Before one becomes enlightened, one has to dream many things !
Very good [chuckling]. Dream well... and make it more colourful and musical!
[An indian sannyasin, said that she was aware of feelings of anger that were coming up directed towards her husband. She then went on to tell Osho that she would be going to the States for a short time.]
I think it is not really anger; it is something else. You have always been suppressing anger. You were just holding things in because of fear. You are becoming truer, more authentic. When somebody becomes truer, many problems arise.
That's why people are false. They are false because of their cleverness. The husband is saying something, and the wife remains in control because it is too risky and there is already too much trouble. Why create more? One simply swallows it.
But that is not good because that makes you false. And if you cannot be angry with your husband,
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