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vision feeling arises, it will be more like sentimentality than like feeling. It will not be real feeling; it will be emotional, sentimental. It will make things foggier for you; it will not help.
Good -- at this moment you need a clear vision, a clarity to see things as they are. Yes, the bird is singing, the trees swaying, the wind is passing through the trees and you see thoughts passing by. You simply see them, you don't have any feeling for them. Good -- because right now if feeling comes you will be clouded; then the clarity will be lost.
Right now, go deep into this clarity. Let things be absolutely clear, crystal clear, and don't hanker for feeling so fast, don't be in a hurry. Once the clarity is complete, total, you will find one day that suddenly feeling is arising. And you will be surprised because that will be a totally new thing that you have not known before. Then you will be able to understand the difference between a sentimental state of mind and a feeling state of mind.
A feeling state has no fog: it is as clear as this clarity -- when a thought passes by and you see it. Exactly in the same way a feeling passes by and you see it; you remain a witness.
My feeling about you is that methods like vipassana will suit you very very deeply. In fact you are not an emotional type at all. So once you understand that that is not your type, things will be very easy. You are a born buddhist; you cannot be a sufi. Yes, you can be a zen nun but you cannot be a sufi, you cannot be a devotee. But there is no need; that is enough! You will go through it, you will reach by going through it.
So don't become worried about it, otherwise you will be disturbing the process; simply get in tune with it. That's how it should be. It's perfectly right.
[Another group member says she thinks that feelings are egoistic; then she thinks, well why not be egoistic?]
Feeling is not egoistic, nor is thought. A feeling can exist without the ego; in fact it can only exist perfectly when there is no ego. A thought exists very very clearly when there is no ego. Ego has nothing to do with feeling and thought. It is something else. Ego is
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