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totality, existence, you cannot make it responsible; but if you call it God, then you can make it responsible -- only the word has changed.
Existence is nonpersonal, impersonal. But if God becomes a person, then you can ask, "Why is there evil?" The whole game is being played by you alone; God is not a party to it. When you give existence a name, a personal name, you create problems. These problems are not authentic problems; they are created problems, invented problems.
God means existence. I cannot say that God exists, because that would be a tautology. It would be just like saying: existence exists, or poetry is poetry. It means nothing, it defines nothing, it clarifies nothing, it explains nothing; it only repeats itself.
To me, God is existence, and existence is impersonal. It cannot be otherwise because the total cannot be a person. How can it be? In contrast to whom can it be an individual, a person? In contrast to whose ego can it create its own ego?
You become an ego because other egos exist. Psychologists say that the sense of ego develops in a child later than the sense of the other. First the child becomes aware of others, then he becomes aware of himself. The ego is a later addition.
You cannot become aware of yourself if there is no other. Without the other you cannot define yourself -- your definition of yourself comes from the other. Others define you; they make you separate. By knowing others you come to feel your own boundaries. Then you know, "I am here, and I am not there." Then you know, "This body is mine, and that body is not mine." Then what is you is clearly defined -- defined by other egos. If there were no other, you would never be aware of yourself as a person.
God cannot become an ego. He cannot say "I" because there is no thou: he cannot define himself. God is indefinable because a definition means a drawing of boundaries, and the total has no boundaries at all. The total means that which has no boundaries, the infinite.
We cannot conceive of the infinite -- whatsoever is conceivable by the mind is finite. Even when we think about the infinite we conceive of it as a greater finiteness,
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