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and welcome you."
It took a long time. The minister was phoning somebody in the capital of Bhopal. The little boy fell asleep and struck his head on the steering wheel. I saw it, I heard it, but I started looking out of the window. He looked at me. I did not give any attention to what had happened. He tried two or three times to look at me: whenever he would look at me, I would look out of the window, so he thought: "It is useless."
When we went back home, after two hours, as he got out of the car he started crying. I said, "What has happened? Why are you crying?"
He said, "It happened two hours before! I had hit my head on the steering wheel. But you are strange: whenever I would look at you for some consolation, you would not look at me. So I thought, what is the point of crying? This man will not even say anything, and even if I cry or weep, my father is out. Now we are back and my mother is here. Now I can cry."
"But," I said, "two hours ago?"
But I could see his argument, it was right. If there is nobody to pay attention to you, what is the point in crying? At home everybody is going to pay attention. Then to make a fuss and cry... although now he is not hurting; it had happened two hours before.
And just a few days ago he was here, and I remembered. Now he has a child of the same age.
Mind is nourished by your attention, for or against.
You just be indifferent; look out of the window.
"It simply takes over and thinks all sorts of silly thoughts and by the time discourse is over I get the feeling I missed another golden opportunity to be with You." Don't call them "silly" thoughts. These adjectives are dangerous: "monster" mind, "silly" thoughts. You are taking great interest in it. Maybe you are against it, but the interest is there.
Be utterly indifferent. It is a golden key. And slowly, slowly the mind will start remaining silent.
And afterwards you repent that "I have missed another opportunity." Never repent about the past because that is again wasting the present. First you wasted the past; now you are wasting the present.
If you have wasted the golden opportunity to be
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