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both are unsatisfied! There is no need to pose anything.
It is a very silent prayer. Making love is meditation. It is sacred, it is the holiest of holies. So while you are making love to a man go very slowly... with taste, taking in every flavour of it. And very slowly: there is no hurry, no need to hurry; enough time is there.
And while making love, forget about orgasm. Rather, be in a relaxed state with the man, relax into each other. The western mind is continuously thinking about when it is coming and how to make it fast and great and this and that. That thinking does not allow the body energies to function. It does not allow the body to have its own way; the mind goes on interfering....
Relax with the man. If nothing happens there is no need for anything to happen. If nothing happens then that is what is happening... and that too is beautiful! Orgasm is not such a thing that it has to happen every day. Sex should be just being together, just dissolving into each other. Then one can keep making love for half an hour, for one hour, just relaxing into the other. Then you will of utter mindlessness, because there is no need for the mind. Love is the only thing where the mind is not needed; and that's where the West is wrong: it brings in the mind even there!
So just relax into each other and forget about the mind. Enjoy the very presence of the other, the meeting, and get lost in it. Don't try to make anything out of it; there is nothing to make. Then one day there will be a valley orgasm; there will be no peak. There will be only relaxation, but that has its own peak because it has depth. Some day the body will trigger itself into a peak orgasm but that will also be coming; you will just be there.
Sometimes there will be a valley, sometimes there will be a peak... and that is a rhythm. You cannot have a peak every day. If you have only peaks then the peak will r be very big. You have to earn the peak by going into the valley. So it is half and half. Sometimes it will be a valley orgasm. Then get lost in the darkness of the valley, the coolness and the peace. That is how you earn a peak. One day the energies are ready: they themselves
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