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right, but I ask you: if while you are awake your breathing stops then what you will do? What can you do? Where will you be? When the breathing has stopped, you will not be here to do ANYTHING."
He said, "I have not seen this side of it. That's true."
"Now," I said, "what are you going to do? Neither can you remain awake nor can you be asleep; in either case the question is the same. So just be normal. When the breathing stops, it stops. You cannot do anything."
He said, "True. I have understood; it is pointless, unnecessary trouble."
You believe, you trust, you have a tremendous faith in existence. Every night you go on sleeping without bothering whether the breathing will continue or not. Breathing is still visible -- your blood circulation, your heartbeat, the whole functioning of digestion -- it is not dependent on you. Once you have swallowed something, you are not supposed to do anything; existence takes over. For everything that is essential in your life you depend totally, on your trust in existence. And this non-essential thing -- a bogus personality which others have made around you -- you cannot come out of it.
It is a simple insight that you will have to come out of this somebodiness and you will have to go through a passage of nobodiness. And only then will you discover your real self -- which is not identity, which is your reality. And to find it is to find everything worth finding.
But you have to take a little risk -- and it is not a great risk. Borrowed ideas....
I used to talk with one of my professors. He was not convinced by me that the whole personality is borrowed. He was a healthy man. He is still alive, retired, an old man. I said, "I will prove it."
I went to his wife and told her, "You have to do me a favor, a small favor."
She said, "What is the matter?"
I said, "When professor S.S. Roy gets up in the morning the first thing you have to say is, `What is happening? Why are you looking so pale?' and remember exactly what he says in response. It is better if you write it down so you don't forget. I want the exact words."
I said to the gardener, "When he comes out,
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