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a definition. You are not a scientist, you are not a painter, you are not a dancer -- you are a poet! But that will be your fulfillment also. You are somebody. Something has flowered in you.
You can play around with things. You can paint one day and become a poet another day, and a third day you can dance, a fourth day you become an actor and on the fifth day something else. You can go on doing this. You will be simply crazy, and in the end you will feel very frustrated.
A committed life comes to a fulfillment, a fruition... it flowers. Maybe it is only one flower, but why hanker for many? One flower is enough. If it has really bloomed and your being is satisfied, one flower is enough. One need not have millions of flowers. In fact if you ask the gardener, he will tell you that if you want a big flower on any plant, you have to cut other buds, leave only one bud so the whole shape, the whole juice, the whole life rushes towards one flower, and then that flower will be something.
So decide to do something .... Some day decide to become a sannyasin, mm? It will give you a direction.
[A sannyasin who had been asked to leave the ashram asked if he were really to leave or if this was a message to indicate that he should apply himself more to the work.]
Apply yourself more to the work... become a help to Laxmi. There is no need to go, but apply yourself more to the work -- and don't avoid it. Because that is detrimental to your growth also. Once you become accustomed to not working, you will stop growing. I allowed you enough time... for years you were not doing anything. I allowed you into the ashram only because now you should start doing. A point has come in your growth where you need to move into the work. But if you just somehow manage to do it, it won't help.
Work is not the only consideration. You should do it happily, lovingly, because if you just do it somehow, like a duty, that will not help. The work will be done, but that will not help you. Work is not the only consideration. You are also -- and you are more important than the work. Become part of the family. Don't remain an outsider.
[The sannyasin says:...
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