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are mad and fanatic; they will not be able to tolerate it."
Mansoor said, "I will try, but there are moments when it is not me who is shouting `Ana'l haq!' I am just a watcher. I hear myself shouting `Ana'l haq! -- I am God!' and it is beyond me. So I will follow your advice; but I cannot promise that I will not shout it, because there are moments I cannot do anything -- just in the marketplace, the madness grips me! And I try hard: the harder I try, the louder I shout `Ana'l haq!'"
Junnaid said, "I do understand your problem, but try your best."
He tried but could not succeed. Whenever he saw people miserable, painful, dragging their lives somehow towards the grave, it was impossible not to shout, "Don't be worried! I am God and you are also God -- you are just asleep. Wake up!"
But people who are asleep are not so easy to wake up. They killed Mansoor because according to Mohammedanism, anybody calling himself God is a kafir, is anti-religious. They killed their best flower.
In these fourteen centuries Mohammedanism has not produced another flower which surpasses Al Hillaj Mansoor -- so innocent and so beautiful and so graceful. And he was saying simply the truth. He said, "What can I do? I feel God within me. My life is nothing but God. He is breathing, he is beating in my heart, he is speaking. Although my master goes on preventing me -- and I respect him and I understand the problem that there are fanatic people, I am putting my life at risk -- but still, a moment comes when the bud has to open and become a flower."
The juices flowing in the tree force the bud to become a flower; and the god dancing within your heart -- how long can you hide it? But as long as it is possible, hide it. Or if it becomes too much, go into privacy. Move into a lonely place, shout and dance and sing and be mad -- but not in the marketplace. The marketplace is very dangerous for religious people; not in the temples, not in the mosque, not in the synagogues -- these are the most dangerous places. Keep yourself completely silent. Best is, don't go to such places. And whenever the urge is too much there are still forests, still mountains, beaches
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