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fisherman looks at Jesus -- those tremendously penetrating eyes, those tremendously silent eyes, more silent than the lake -- and Jesus says to that man, "What are you doing? Why are you wasting your whole life in catching fish? Come with me, I will teach you how to catch men. Why go on wasting your life catching fish? Come follow me!"
A great moment. The man must have wavered between decidophobia and disciplehood. But then he gathered courage, he threw the net into the lake, and he followed Jesus.
By the time they were getting out of the town, a man came running and said to the fisherman, "Where are you going? Your father who was ill is dead. Come back home!"
And the fisherman asks Jesus' permission: "Let me go for three, four days so I can finish with the last rites for my dead father, and then I will come."
And Jesus said, "Forget all about it. There are enough dead people in the town, they will bury the dead. You come follow me!" And he followed, he forgot all about his dead father.
This is disciplehood. Those who followed Jesus were disciples, but Christians are not disciples; now they are following a dead tradition. Those who followed Buddha were disciples, but Buddhists are not disciples. you are my disciples; some day or other your children's children will also remember me -- they will not be my disciples. If your children start remembering me, loving me, because of you, then they are not related to me -- then they have a fear of decision. Don't create that fear in your children's minds. Let them decide themselves.
Life can become very rich if people are left to decide. But the society tries to force decisions on you. Society is afraid that if it does not decide for you, you may not be able to decide. But, in fact, because of this, by and by you lose the capacity to decide things. And once you lose your decisiveness, you lose your soul.
The word 'soul' means an integrated unity within you. It comes out of great, fatal decisions. The more you decide and the more risky the decision is, the more integrated you become, crystallized.
If you have decided -- and remember the emphasis -- if you have decided
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