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be respectful, but love is not possible. Once you understand that love is not possible the guilt feeling will disappear; then you are just being normal. If it is possible, you are abnormal; you need some treatment.
There are a few people who become too attached to, too obsessed with, their parents; they are psychologically ill. If a woman loves the mother too much she will not be able to love a man because she will always find that her mother will suffer, that it will be creating a kind of conflict. If she loves a man her love will flow towards that man and she will feel guilty. So there are a few women who remain attached to the mother and the father, and a few men who remain attached to the parents. They are ill people -- they will never enjoy life. And because they will not enjoy life, they will be angry also at their parents. Deep down they will be murderous; they will hope 'Some day if the mother dies or if the father dies, then I will be free,' although they will not tell it to anybody -- not even to themselves will they tell it. It will just be there lurking in their unconscious, because that seems to be the only possibility to be free. That's not good -- to think of your parents as dead -- but that's how it happens if you become too attached.
There is no need -- just be respectful, that's all. Take care, whatsoever you can do, do, but don't feel guilt at all. It is because of the guilt that you behave horribly. Just see the point: because you feel guilty, certainly you feel it is her presence that is making you feel guilty and destroying your happiness. She is a disturbance, so when you come to see her you start behaving horribly -- that is a natural by-product. And when you feel horrible back home you will feel more guilty. This-is a vicious circle: you will feel more guilty, next time you will behave more horribly and so on, so forth; there is no end to it.
Drop the guilt. You are perfectly normal; this is how things should be. And if parents are understanding they will understand this. This happens in animals -- in animals there is no question: the moment the child is able to stand on his or her own, the child leaves the parents.
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