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Main Index
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you laugh a little.
Seamus is leaning on the bar in the pub, when Paddy comes in with a perfect black eye.
"Hey, Paddy!" says Seamus, "That's a beautiful black eye you have there. Who hit you?"
"As a matter of fact," says Paddy, after ordering a beer, "Fergus O'Reilly hit me."
"My God!" says Seamus, "with what?"
"Well, as a matter of fact," replies Paddy, "he had a wooden stick in his hand."
"And I suppose," remarks Seamus, "that you did not have anything in your hand?"
"As a matter of fact," says Paddy, sipping his beer, "I had in my hand Kathie O'Reilly's left breast, an object of great beauty -- but no use in a fight!"
One day, Kowalski walks into the circus manager's office and says,
"I have got a great act to show you. I can do a swallow dive from one hundred feet onto solid ground."
The circus manager is skeptical but agrees to see the act. So they go into the big tent and Kowalski climbs up the ladder to the top. Then he does a perfect dive to the ground. He lands on his head with a terrific crunch, but then gets up, rubbing himself and groaning softly.
The manager runs over to him and says, "That was amazing! The most incredible act I have ever seen! I will give you five hundred dollars a night!"
Kowalski shakes his head. So the manager says, "Okay, just name your price and I will pay it!"
"I am sorry," replies Kowalski, "I don't want to do it again. I had no idea it would hurt so much!"
Now enter into real Zen. First beat the drum, Nivedano, and everybody gets into gibberish.
(Drumbeat)
(Gibberish)
Nivedano...
(Drumbeat)
Everybody gets into absolute silence, no movement, gather your energy inwards and look within.
This is the no-word answer of Hyakujo.
And this is the sickle of Nansen that cuts really well.
Nivedano...
(Drumbeat)
Relax.
Nivedano...
(Drumbeat)
Please come back.
Okay, Maneesha?
Yes, Osho.
This, This, A Thousand Times This: The Very Essence of Zen
Chapter #4
Chapter title: The heartbeat of the universe
30 May 1988
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