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about the past, never about the future. I can see what is possible, but there are a thousand possibilities and only one will become actual. I have given you the method to try. If you were really willing it would have happened -- but nothing can happen against you.
Watch your own mind: deep down, very deep down, you did not want it to succeed. On the surface you were trying everything; because I had told you, you were trying. You trusted me so you were trying, but deep down there was an element which didn't want it to happen -- maybe it was very unconscious, maybe you are still not alert about it -- so it didn't happen.
Nothing can happen against you, and I am not here to force anything to happen against you. I can simply show you the way and say to try it. That's why you are feeling very right. You are happy that it didn't happen.
And now another thing: side by side, you had a good opportunity to doubt me too. That too is always there: hidden behind trust there is always doubt. And I am not saying that there is anything wrong in it; it is natural. How can you trust me absolutely? You have not done anything absolutely. How can you trust me absolutely? It is impossible, inhuman... I don't expect it either.
Your trust is a layer; behind the layer is deeper doubt. You will find every opportunity to doubt, and whenever you can find an opportunity you will never miss it. In fact, you will miss many opportunities to trust but you will never miss any opportunity to doubt -- watch it!
If I give you one hundred opportunities and ninety-nine are to help trust, you can miss them, but the one that creates doubt you will not miss. It is just as if I do ninety-nine loving acts to you and you forget them and one day I am angry at you -- only one act of anger -- and you cannot forget, you cannot forgive. You forget all those ninety-nine acts of love. One act of anger becomes tremendously important because deep down the mind needs, is waiting to feed on, any negativity possible.
So you enjoyed two things: first you enjoyed the woman being dropped and your being finished -- no more botheration. Secondly, you enjoyed another trip also -- that
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