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Main Index
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become aware of its presence.
It is like the air: you don't become aware of its presence. It is like the ocean that surrounds the fish: the fish never becomes aware of it. It is like the pressure of the air: the pressure is so much, it has always been there, but you are not aware of it. It is like gravitation: it is so much, but you are not aware of it. It is like the earth rushing with great speed round and round the sun: the earth is a spaceship, but nobody is aware of it. We are aboard a spaceship, and it is going at a great speed. Still we are not aware of it.
Awareness needs some gaps. When there are no gaps you fall asleep; you cannot remain aware.
If one has always been healthy, one will not be aware of health. Awareness needs gaps -- sometimes you should not be healthy. You should fall ill, then you can have a sense of health. If there was no darkness in the world and there was only light, nobody would have ever known light; people would have missed it.
That's how we go on missing the original self -- you can call it God or nirvana, it doesn't matter. Sufis have two beautiful words. One is FANA: FANA means dissolving the ego, dissolving the false substitute. And the other word is BAQA: BAQA means the arrival, the arising, of the real self.
The real self is universal. How to find it? It is not far away, so you are not to make a long journey to it. It is so close that no journey is needed at all. It is within you. Rather than journeying, you will have to learn how to sit silently.
That's what meditation is all about -- just sitting silently doing nothing. Thoughts arise: you watch. Desires arise: you watch. But you remain the watcher. You don't become a victim of the desires and the thoughts that are arising; you remain a watcher. You remain the context of all contexts, you remain the space before which everything appears. But the space never appears before itself -- it cannot, it is impossible.
The mirror cannot mirror itself, the eyes cannot see themselves. I cannot catch hold of my hand with the same hand; it is impossible.
This is the most fundamental thing to remember, Parmita. You are the watcher
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