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the fact that this was the whole ego effort -- in a new direction but it was the same game!
In that moment of recognition he dropped all projection, all ambition; he rested under the tree. For the first time in millions of lives. he rested... because a mind can rest only when there is no ambition -- otherwise, how can you rest? You are after it in the day, you are after it in the night, you are after it awake, you are after it asleep -- how can you rest? An ambitious mind knows no rest.
For the first time he was really relaxed. There was nowhere to go and there was nothing to do, so how to create restlessness? Everything simply collapsed, all projections dropped, all dreams simply disappeared.
That night he slept in absolute stillness, in great restfulness; the relaxation was total. And in the morning when the last star was fading, he opened his eyes -- for no reason; there was no motivation now. There was no motivation to even open the eyes.
Every other day, every other morning, he was awake with the motivation -- now again he has to do this and that and meditate and do austerities and go to this teacher and read that scripture; there was motivation. That morning there was nowhere to go and there was no motivation. Just try to comprehend those eyes without motivation....
He opened the eyes because now the sleep was over -- not that there was any motivation to open the eyes; there was no need to close them, that's all; it was negative. He opened the eyes and with the last star disappearing he became enlightened. The wall you are talking about disappeared, because now there was no motivation.
The motivation is the cause of the wall. It is your own motivation that is hindering you! So drop all motivations!
And I am not saying to create a new motivation, because when you are nodding your head, I know why you are nodding! (laughter) I know! I exactly know why you are nodding your head. You are saying, 'Right, bhagwan! So now let this be the motivation! So now I will try! Here is your [sannyasin] -- I will try! I will try my best to drop all motivation.' But again you have created a motivation, and you have missed!
This
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