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Smoking is also vegetarian! Tobacco is not anything non-vegetarian, it is vegetarian. And just taking the smoke in and out is only a way of doing pranayama, doing a little bit of exercise, breathing exercise -- harmful to you, but not much to make a fuss about.
But people try to control it. If they succeed they become egoistic, which is far more dangerous. If they fail they feel guilty, they feel depressed, which is far more dangerous. If they fail they become condemnatory towards themselves, they lose respect for themselves. And the moment you lose respect for yourSelf, remember, you are losing your trust in life. You will be living now just at the minimum, your life will not have the dance, it will not have the quality of celebration; it will be only a dragging
But this sado-masochistic idea exists in everybody. Jainism has only reformed it, developed it, idealized it, philosophized about it, argued about it. It is only one of the aspects of the mind.
The Buddhist has developed another aspect of the mind, the escapist. Avoid, escape, go to the mountains, go to the forests. Renounce life. That too is in everybody more or less. It depends what kind of conditioning has been imposed upon you.
These are all aspects of the mind. You can develop any aspect but it remains of the mind. It is not spiritual at all.
Zen is a transcendence of the mind. It does not develop any aspect of the mind, it takes you beyond the mind. And the only way to go beyond the mind is to enter into life hero and now. You are not to be a sado-masochist, you are not to be an escapist, you are not to be a fanatic, you are not to be a phony, a 'holier than thou', an egoist, you just have to be ordinary, utterly ordinary, in tune with life, harmonious with life.
Yes, I agree with James Broughton: 'Zen is another word for Zest, living life passionately, making life a joy, a festival, a feasting, a love, a laughter -- yes, he is right -- 'for zip and zap and zing. If you have no appetite for life as it is, and are not excited by the koan of what this here life is about, then Zen is not for you.'
Then I am also not for you.
If you are trying to
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